a great source of protein! Air guitar is probably one of the most fun and enriching things a person can engage in. Out of all the activities I have participated in during my adult life – including all the jobs I have worked – I have never made so many best friends in one night as I have during every instance I have participated in a US Air Guitar competition. In Slapstick, one of my favorite novels, Kurt Vonnegut points out that everyone has an extended family – if you’re a writer, all other writers are your kin; same goes for other doctors if you’re a doctor, or other scientists if you’re a scientist. I don’t think this has ever been truer for any kind of person as it is for competitive air guitarists. It takes a certain kind of person to do this sort of thing, and I think EVERYONE is grateful for that. This is the main reason I am about to drop a mad amount of cash to do something that will
give me no monetary return whatsoever. It’s THAT important for me to see these people, to be among them, and to unleash my demons (my delicious, pork-filled demons) through the medium of competitive air guitar. Last-minute flights to D.C. (or ANYWHERE, for that matter) are pretty damn expensive, so I am asking anyone who has air guitar in their heart and/or soul to please send a donation of any size (EVERY little bit helps) the way of the Pork Sword. Here’s how the incentives break down: $5 – Personalized FB comment/thank you message $10 – Personalized autographed Pork Sword photo $20 – Personalized video of Pork Sword performing for you! $30 – A sampler of fine deli-select meats (chosen by Pork Sword) $50 – Original Pork Sword Pig Mask (ONE ONLY) $100 – Original Pork Sword performance robe [unwashed] (ONE ONLY) Just click on the link below to claim your special treats! Thanks in advance to everyone who donates. If you do, you won’t just be helping me – you’ll be aiding all of US Air Guitar in their continuing quest for world peace. Because, if everyone in the world plays an air guitar, no one will be able to hold a gun! Cheers, Cameron “Pork Sword” Hawk